L.A. wants me out of here.

My move, as I have it planned, is for the 16th of December. This is the day following my art installation at AVENUE 50 STUDIO (131 N. Avenue 50, Highland Park, CA 90042). As you can imagine, since I have a month, I've been packing at my leisure and placing everything in my garage, which is where I ran into my landlord (the fat weasel). He begins to ask me if I'm planning on moving, which I respond to affirmatively and then proceeded to tell him the date. This caught him off guard (and made him quite happy as he gets to almost double our rent), but then I hit him with the zinger to dash his hopes, the fact that my girlfriend is staying for another year. At this point he begins to tell me that he hasn't decided into what unit he wants to move into just yet, mine or the middle one, which he vacated by telling the previous tenant that he was going to move into that unit. This is illegal to do in Los Angeles. Basically, if I wanted to stay indefinitely, he was going to "move" into my unit, but since my girlfriend is only staying an additional year, he's going to wait her out and save the $3500 moving fee that he'd have to pay her (he told me this in a way so that I understood that he was a nice guy).

So, even if I wanted to stay in L.A., I was going to have to move from my current digs, which is a 1950's ranch house in Los Feliz to something less charming.

No, thanks.